My One Perfect Thing
by Chloe Winchester
Summary: Quinn has a confession to make, and the reaction wasn't one she expected. FaberryAU No Finchel hate! Spoilers through 3.06
1. Chapter 1

-My first shot at Faberry! Tell me what you think! Caity, this is for you ;)-

**My One Perfect Thing**

I'm angry. I'm always angry, and everyone knows it. I'm angry that Puck got me pregnant. I'm angry that I had to give up my baby. I'm angry that I can't get her back. I'm angry I lost Prom Queen to a boy, I'm angry those people hurt Kurt. I'm angry that my father won't speak to me. I'm angry that Coach Sylvester doesn't want me near her Cheerios anymore. I'm angry that I lost everything. I'm angry that I cheated on Finn. I'm angry I cheated on Sam. I'm angry that Finn broke up with me and hasn't spoken to me since the funeral last year. I'm angry that Mr. Schuester gave me the most hypocritical speech I ever heard. I'm angry that no one bothered to wonder why I acted the way I did over the summer and dyed my hair pink and started smoking.

No one asked because no one cared. Everyone wants to tell me what to do. Puck, Shelby, Finn, Mr. Schue, Santana, everyone. And I hate them. I've hated them for three years.

I'm angry at everything and everyone because I can't have her. She's always been so close, right within my grasp but I can't have her. I've missed my chance every time. I'm angry because I have these feelings that I've never had a chance to let out.

I'm in love with Rachel Berry, and it pisses me the fuck off.

I'm angry because I had to hang onto Finn so he would stay away from her. I felt it at Prom. She looked so beautiful, dancing in those lights, singing that sad song of hers. I wish she'd sing for me, just once. It breaks my heart when I hear her sing, and it's for him. It's always for him. He has her now and he doesn't treat her the way I would. I would make sure the first thing she does everyday is smile. I would treat her like the princess she is. I wouldn't let a single soul hurt her, and if someone did I would end their life.

I can say this easily enough now because I'm used to it. I'm used to feeling this way about her. It's tugged and pulled at my heart for so long that I don't even notice now. I get a pang every time I see her, a tear when she kisses Finn, a flutter when she sings or smiles.

I would be so good to her, and I'd show her if she didn't have Finn around. I really would.

But for now, I sit here in the choir room as usual, watching the light hit her hair, watching her smile and gab away in that stupid sweater and those stupid tights that are way too adorable for any human being and suffer in silence.

That's what I do.

* * *

><p>"Alright, guys, who wants to go first?" Mr. Schue said, clapping his hands together.<p>

"I'll go."I turned when I heard Quinn's soft voice. She stepped down daintily in her cotton dress, purple cardigan buttoned halfway, hair wrapped in a headband. Perfect as usual. She sat on the stool, hands folding in her lap. There was a small smile on her delicate lips that faded when the music started.

"_When somebody loved me, everything was beautiful._

_Every hour spent together lives within my heart. _

_And when she was sad_

_I was there to dry her tears._

_And when she was happy, so was I._

_When she, loved me." _

Finn frowned, glancing at me. I didn't meet his gaze. I was too busy staring at Quinn, whose eyes never left mine, locked there. She was about to cry.

"_So the years went by_

_I stayed the same. _

_But __she __began __to __drift __away__…" _Her gaze shifted to Finn, just for a moment.

_I was left alone._

_Still I waited for the day_

_When she'd say 'I will always love you.'_

_Lonely and forgotten_

_Never thought she'd look my way_

_And she smiled at me_

_And held me_

_Just __like __she __used __to __do__…"_ A tear fell to her cheek.

_Like she loved me_

_When she loved me_

_When somebody loved me _

_Everything was beautiful._

_Every hour spent together lives within my heart _

_When she loved me."_

The song ended with her wiping her eyes. Before anyone could move or dare to speak, she ran out, crying.

* * *

><p>I didn't care that the whole Glee Club knew. I didn't care that the school would know by the end of the day the second Santana found out. I ran out of there crying because I may have just ruined Rachel and Finn's relationship because I had to act out like a selfish child. I did it with Finn before, I did it with Beth and now I'm doing it to Rachel.<p>

"DAMN IT!" I slammed my fist into the tile, falling against it, sobbing. The assignment for the week was confessions. It's Mr. Schue's fault this happened. Him and his stupid assignment and that stupid song for being so damn perfect…Rachel for being so damn perfect.

The bathroom door opened but I didn't move.

"Quinn?"

My throat went dry and closed, refusing to let me speak. My brain shut down and I couldn't move.

She was coming closer. Her hand gently touched my shoulder. "Quinn, can you talk to me?"

"About what?" I managed. "The fact that I love you or that I just made Finn break up with you?"

"He didn't break up with me," she said softly. That hurt worse. "He got up and left too." I glanced at her briefly.

"Stop looking at me like that," I gulped.

"Like what?" She sounded scared.

I shook my head. "I'm sorry, Rachel. I shouldn't have done that in front of everyone. I shouldn't have sang a song where somewhere in my mind you loved me, just for awhile. I'd settle for one day…" I shook my head. "I didn't need to do that. You don't need this right now, you have school and Finn and your dreams to worry about. You don't need me screwing up your life." There was a lapse of silence before she spoke again.

"You could never screw up my life, Quinn." She was so quiet I could barley hear her.

I looked at her, my eyes so blurry with tears I couldn't see straight. "What are you saying?" I breathed.

"I-I mean…" She swallowed, wringing her hands. "I mean that I might love-"

"Don't tell me this unless you're serious," I warned. "If you're not sure, or if you're just caught up in the moment then don't say it."

She sighed, her expression determined. "I might love you too, Quinn."

My chest hurt. I wasn't sure if it was from crying or what she'd just said. She said she might love me too.

"What about Finn?" I choked.

"I…I don't know yet," she said honestly, staring at the floor. "But I wanted you to know that. I want you to know that I have feelings for you too. I just don't know what to do about them, yet."

She took my hand. I stared at her, trying to get this pathetic expression off of my face. "I'll let you know the second I figure it out, okay?" She spoke gently. There was no accusation in her voice, no blaming, no yelling. There never was. She'd never yell at me. Rachel would never _ever_ hurt me. Not on purpose.

I was crying all over again. I felt a tissue dab my eyes with her cute little hands behind it. "Shh… It's okay."

"I thought you'd hate me," she said. "Or freak out, or…"

"I guess we surprised each other," she smiled. I half-smiled back. "I'm gonna hug you now." She was soft and warm, just like I always wanted her to be. "I'll call you later," she assured, still holding me. "I have to go talk to Finn, okay?"

I nodded. "It's okay if you choose him."

She stared at me, pain I never wanted to see in those big brown eyes. She squeezed my shoulder and left, looking back before the door closed.

tbc...

-Song "When She Loved Me" Sarah McLachlan, Toy Story 2 soundtrack so Disney doesn't sue me either. Feedback please!-


	2. Chapter 2

**My One Perfect Thing**

"I don't understand!"

"Finn-"

"What does she want with you? I mean, not _that_ right? God, what the hell? First she tries to take me from you and now she's trying to take you! What kind of game is she trying to play?" He demanded.

"I don't think she is, for once," Rachel mumbled. He spun around, confused, angry and scared.

"What? Don't…do you actually _feel_ something for her, do you?" He said.

"I don't know," she said softly.

"So, you don't know how you feel about me?"

"Finn," she sighed, exasperated. "You know I love you."

"Then what's the issue?" He said. She looked at him, eyes watering.

"Finn, I, I just don't know, okay?" She gulped. "I just need some time to think about it. Can you at least give me that?" He glared at her. She wasn't sure if was angry with her of the situation.

"Fine," he spat, storming toward the door. "You call me when you decide if I'm still worth your time or not." He stalked from the choir room, shouldering past Kurt as he did so.

The countertenor frowned, quickly going to his crying friend, knowing without asking what was wrong. He hugged her, smoothing his hair and shushing her gently. "Quinn?" He said. She nodded miserably.

"I don't know what to do," he gulped. He held her shoulders, looking at her steadily.

"You do whatever your heart wants you to do," he advised. "Don't worry about Quinn, don't worry about Finn. You do what you do best and just worry about you." He smiled wryly, teasing him. She smiled through her tears, chuckling softly.

"Thank you, Kurt," she gulped. He smiled his welcome.

"And if you do choose Quinn, I can handle Finn. I know how crazy he can get when something like this happens," he sighed.

"I don't want to hurt him," she said, shaking her head, sniffling.

"I know, I know, but, sometimes people have to get hurt. It wouldn't be right for you to lead him on if you don't feel something for Quinn," he said. She nodded again. He thumbed a tear away, still smiling to reassure her. "Now you give this some time and think about it, okay? No one's rushing you. Take your time."

"Okay," she breathed. Kurt gave her shoulder one last squeeze before he trotted back out into the hallway, slipping his fingers in Blaine's and heading down the hall.

Rachel took a deep breath, sat down, and started to re-think, well…everything.

* * *

><p>Quinn had finally calmed herself down, tears dried, make-up reapplied, composure set again.<p>

That's when Finn barged into the girl's bathroom, face red and contorted in anger. She knew this look. This is what Finn looked like when his heart was hurting. He was angry, confused and terrified that he'd be losing the love of his life to his crazy ex-girlfriend. Judging by how worked up he was, this was going to be loud and painful for the both of them. She wondered distantly if he had talked to Rachel when he felt like this.

"What are you trying to do?" He bellowed. "What, I leave you for her so you try to take her away from me?"

"No, Finn, that's no what I was trying to do," she said softly.

"Then what? What game are you playing? Is this some way of getting closer to Shelby so you can try and steal Beth again? WHAT?" He snarled. Quinn folded her arms, her firm, unforgiving gaze rising to her face.

"Why is it so hard to believe that I actually care about her?" She asked, knowing that this would get dirty real fast.

"Because it's impossible for you to love Quinn," _Bingo_. "You gonna cheat on her too? With who? You gonna go after me again?"

"No," her voice was strong.

"Well, you've cheated on everyone _else_ you've ever been with, why should Rachel be any different?" He challenged.

"Because," if he got to be mean, then so did she. "You didn't make me happy. Neither did Sam or Puck. None of you had what I needed and when things got rough, you left. I was in love with you when you dumped me for Rachel, so don't act like you're totally innocent in this-"

"I didn't lie about a pregnancy, Quinn!"

"I lied to you to PROTECT YOU!"

"YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH MY BEST FRIEND!"

She took a breath, looking at the floor. "That has nothing to do with Rachel. I've hurt you, and you've hurt me. We both know that. But this has nothing to do with you and I. This is about Rachel and me or you and her. It's her decision, not ours. I love her, probably more than you do."

"You can't love, Quinn, we've been over this."

"That's a damn lie and you know it!" She spat.

"You can't prove you love her more. He stepped closer to her, intimidating her. "Stay away from my girlfriend." He warned, angry. "You have no right to just waltz in and take her away from me. You leave her alone."

"What if she picks me instead of you?" She asked. "What if she picks me without me having to go off on her like she's done something wrong? What happens if it's her choice and not mine?" He shook his head.

"You're not gonna make Rachel go for girls, okay? Rachel's not gay," he said, justifying it to assure himself. He was so terrified of losing her, especially like this, to Quinn. To a girl. But he wasn't about to go without a fight.

"I'm not gay, either. If you want to hear from someone that can attest to that, why don't you talk to your "_best__friend_" Puck?" She growled. "Sam too. I don't know why I love Rachel, but I do. I have for three years, okay? I didn't want you guys to break up because of me, I didn't say those things for her to come running to me," she said firmly, tears in her eyes.

"Then why'd you do it?" He snarled. Quinn glared at him, her mascara dewing again.

"Because it's our senior year. I…I had to tell her. I couldn't keep it a secret anymore," she said, quiet still. Finn's anger flared again.

"Rachel will _never_ be with you. Not now, not ever. So _stay __away __from __her_," he warned. "Join the Troubletones, or quit glee club. Go back to the damn Cheerios for all I care. I don't give a damn. Just stay away from my girlfriend." He turned, storming away, fuming.

Quinn stood, hands and lips trembling, alone and surrounded by cold tile and weighted silence.

She collapsed to her knees, sobbing at the floor, wondering why it seemed to be a crime to love someone.

_How does Kurt do it?_

* * *

><p>"I'm not on anyone's side here!" Kurt said, holding up his hands while his brother paced the floor. "I'm just trying to offer a different perspective.<p>

"What kind of perspective?" Finn growled.

"That Rachel is a lot more upset about this than you are," he explained. "She just found out that someone's in love with her when she's obviously in love with you. Her entire world's been turned upside down and she has to consider this, how she feels. Because if she _does_ feel something for Quinn she doesn't want to lead you on by staying with you. If you really care about her, Finn, you'll give her time."

The tall boy frowned, finally sitting down and looking at the floor. "Okay."

"And don't talk to Quinn," he warned. Finn's eyes fell. "IF you talk to her while you're like this you'll only make things worse." He remained silent. The countertenor's eyes grew, angry. "You didn't," he said. Still silence. "Damn it, Finn!" He growled, exasperated. He stood, shaking his head. "And I thought Rachel was selfish. You _have_ to think about other people, Finn! You can't just bully her out of her feelings! It doesn't work that way!"

"I know," he said, ashamed. "I was upset and-"

"She's upset too, Finn. She bared her soul in front of all her friends and people she trusted, and that's what she gets for it. It's no wonder she dyed her hair and went insane," he sighed, heading for the door.

"Where are you going?" Finn asked. Kurt turned.

"To be a friend to someone that's all alone," he explained.


	3. Chapter 3

**My One Perfect Thing**

"Quinn!" She heard her mother call. "There's someone at the door for you, honey!"

"Who is it?" She spat, trying not to be so short with her but unable to help it.

"Kurt!"

She frowned, confused and suspicious. _What the hell does he want? I mean yeah, he's Rachel's best friend…but he's also Finn's brother. I swear to _God_ if he's here to lecture me or yell at me the way he did I might just throw him out the window. _

She wiped her eyes, checking herself in the mirror before coming out of her room and leaning over the rail. Kurt stood at the foyer beside her mother, looking determined. His eyes held a certain pity when he looked at her, sad with the slightest hint of anger that she prayed wasn't directed at her. The last thing she needed was the entire glee club to be pissed at her. Again.

She trotted down the stairs, nodding to her mother, who left the room with a small, slightly confused smile.

"What do you want, Kurt?" She asked when they were alone.

"To tell you Finn is an idiot and you didn't deserve whatever verbal harassment you got from him," he said simply. She blanched, genuinely surprised. "Quinn, I know that this is difficult for you," he said softly, now wanting to disturb her mother. "And I know you're really confused and the only thing you have set in your mind is that you care about Rachel. I want you to know," he put his hand on her shoulder, nodding as he met her eyes, "that's the only thing that matters. You care about her, that's all you have to be sure of and there's nothing wrong with what you're feeling."

"I don't want her to leave Finn," she said truthfully, tears in her eyes. "That's not what I wanted. I just…I just wanted her to know."

"I know," he said gently. "And she'll figure out what she wants to do about it. Just know that you two will still be friends and I know she won't want anything to change no matter what. Okay?" She nodded, swallowing hard.

"Thank you," she said. "I figured everybody would hate me for trying to break Finn and Rachel up." He shrugged.

"Who cares if they do? You got your feelings out there, you got that massive weight off your chest, and you feel better now that she knows, right?" He asked. She nodded. "Then what does it matter?"

"It doesn't," she agreed, jaw set. _Only Rachel matters._ Kurt hugged her, something he didn't do often with people that weren't Blaine, gently rubbing her back.

"It'll be alright, Quinn," he assured. Those four words broke her, leaving her crying in Kurt's arms. He frowned, still holding her, though a little thrown. But he stayed where he was, knowing precisely how she felt, and how much worse it would be if she were alone.

* * *

><p>Rachel stood from her spot in the choir room, shutting off her phone and stuffing it deep inside her purse, so sick of hearing it ring every few minutes.<p>

"Damn it, Finn," she spat. She didn't want to talk to him right now. In fact she didn't want to talk to anyone. She'd thought all of this through, every bit of it. And right now, everything hinged on _one_ little thing she needed from Quinn, and as she stalked down the hall, she decided that this needed to be resolved tomorrow, not for her own benefit, but so Quinn didn't have to go through whatever agony she was at the moment any longer than she had to.

She sat down at her vanity the moment she got home, giving the simple excuse of "Glee club" when her Dads asked her where she'd been.

She dug through her drawers, hastily taking out two pieces of personalized stationary she'd gotten last quarter for her report card and began writing frantically.

The first page held a short message that didn't take very long, and the second…the second message was only in case something happened tomorrow that changed things, that changed everything. She sighed, tears in her eyes.

This was all happening so fast. She was almost literally dizzy, her mind still reeling even though she'd already made up her mind.

She stared at both letters for what felt like hours before closing her eyes, praying.

* * *

><p>Quinn walked through the halls without paying much attention to those around her. She avoided talking to Santana and Brittany, not wanting to hear her insults or harsh words; she'd had enough of that for the week.<p>

She did make eye-contact with Kurt once and managed to smile as he did at her, one saving grace in this stupid mess. Finn glowered at her whenever she was in a thirty-foot radius, making a proper ass out of himself.

_Glad the talk worked, Kurt_, she thought miserably as she hurried to Biology.

The one person she wanted to see, but didn't all day, was Rachel. No matter how much or how hard she scanned the halls, she remained aloof. It wasn't until the end of the day that she saw a sign of life from her. A note on glittery pink paper fell out of her locker. She snatched it up, tearing it open quickly.

_Meet me in the auditorium after school,_ it read, the bottom signed RB in the same loopy handwriting.

* * *

><p>"You wanna come by my house after school?" Finn asked, looking down at his girlfriend. "We could watch a movie or something."<p>

"I can't," she said, not meeting his eyes as she continued to dig through her locker.

"Why not?" He frowned.

"I have a lot of homework I need to get done," it was a lie, yes, but hopefully he wouldn't notice.

"Oh," he didn't. "Okay. Maybe some other time."

"Yeah," she flashed him a small, fake smile before slinging her bag over her shoulder. "I'll see you soon." She walked away, heart heavy, mind whirring.

She waited in her car until he left before going back to the auditorium, testing Fate.

* * *

><p>Quinn was pacing back and forth across the stage, terrified. What if she was angry too? What if she hated her for driving a wedge between her and Finn?<p>

_God, what did she want?_

"Quinn?"

She turned, heart in her throat, stomach a block of ice. There she was, beautiful as ever in her tights and stupid vintage dress. She smiled at her, only making Quinn's inability to breathe worse.

"I wasn't trying to hurt you," she blurted, pain in her eyes. Rachel nodded, taking a few steps closer to her.

"I know," she assured.

"I wasn't trying to break up you and Finn either, I-"

"Hey," she said softly, touching her shoulder. "It's okay, Quinn. I understand why you did it." Another weak nod.

"So…now what?" She whispered. Rachel took a deep breath, looking right in her eyes.

"Kiss me."


End file.
